my bestfriend/cousin of 16 years has recently had a glow up and became a terrible person. What do I do… (summary at the end)

2022.01.16 16:03 Dear_Web_5339 my bestfriend/cousin of 16 years has recently had a glow up and became a terrible person. What do I do… (summary at the end)

Hi. Buckle up because this is a lot..So I’m f(16) and my best friend/cousin of my whole life has been acting very oddly lately. A little backstory, we’re both the same age and both (f) and have been attached at the hips intill recently. My mom has been abusive to me my whole life and lots of people just put it past her because she’s crazy. I’m not the first kid she’s abused and hurt (she has 4 kids in total 2 girls 2 boys she abused me and my sister more because she hates girls. But my other brother and sister are older so they’ve been moved out) I made sure I would be the last that she would abuse. So when she kicked me out a little while back I didn’t go back, and life has been rough. I don’t go to school, I’m on runaway status, and I have no money nor a job to my name because I need parental consent.
Anyways, since life has changed for me im not a normal teenager anymore. I’m basically a adult fending for my life. So me and my cousin are now two different people. We can’t relate to the same things. But, it doesn’t excuse the ways she’s been acting since it’s basic human decency, and me being more ‘mature’ shouldn’t matter. She still has no way to act like this. My cousin lives a pretty good life, both mom and dad, 2 brothers she has great relationships with, her mom is the best cooks every night(my fav aunt!), and they sit for dinner like a family. Go to my little cousins basketball games every Saturday as a family and cheer him on, she has a bf who lives up the street they hang everyday, her siblings love him, and she has friends she hangs out with a lot. And good job, good money. She finally has the life we dreamed for as teens when we were younger.
even tho I can no longer live that life I still cheer her on from afar. I love she’s finally happy and it gives me hope. I’m proud, even if we started to fall off.She’s even been losing weight again, and she’s just beautiful. But that’s where the problems start to come in.. when we were younger there was one point in time where she was very skinny. (For reference we are known as ‘fat’ because we both have very mature bodies. Even with no stomach, we come from a family that usually doesn’t have mature bodies if that makes sense. ‘Big butts&bigboobs’ are looked down on. Even tho that’s the social media beauty standards my family doesn’t have it, and hates anyone who does.One of the reasons my mom hated me.)
so at this time when she was very skinny, she acted weird towards me. Like she was better then me. didn’t want to hang with me, made weird comments. And was very boujee & stuck up. We even laughed about it when we got older, and she always apologizes. But it’s happening again. She has lost weight again because she had Covid and couldn’t eat much. (Her words) and she looks great! She finally got the body she wanted. I have also lost weight. But I’m 4’11 .. thick. So having a flat stomach doesn’t matter when ur body is mature. And I have very bad body dysmorphia.
We decided to hang out again after so long (this weekend) and she’s been making lots of comments about her body near me. Saying how she’s so big and fat, has a fat stomach, and just.. much more. She says this around me knowing I’m a little bigger then her. I kept reassuring her.. telling her she looks great. And she only has lose skin from losing weight. She even mentioned how she’s now a size 6 in jeans.. like that was ‘to big’ even tho she sized at least 4 sizes down.
She’s been snarky to me, even pointed out my s/h?? Which she never used to do. When we were watching a show a trans girl came in the movie and she laughed about how the girl was a guy, and no one should change. (She’s never really cared about that) and I defended the girl because who cares what someone else does what their body honestly. She kept trying to get me to say slurs towards other races.. and laughed in my face around her family about how I won’t be transphobic, racist, or homophobic. She said ‘wow my name is so boring she won’t be homophobic or even racist” it was so awkward. I tried to laugh it off and say I really couldn’t care less what someone else does with their life. And I have a gay brother.. she knows that. She loves him, he’s everyone’s favorite. And a bi sister who she adores and looks up to.So I don’t understand how she could talk so bad about people like him when she’s obsessed with him. Aswell as my sister.
I always think about if I was to ever be put in a situation of coming out, and how I would want people to support me. That’s why I support lgbtq and obviously don’t like racists. Because I am a poc myself. It really rubs me the wrong way that’s she’s becoming what we used to make fun of her for being as a kid. I’m thinking about going back to my little hideout and ghosting her. I always feel unwanted at her house anyways because my mom has harassed her family for trying to help me in the past. So there’s honestly no reason for me to be here. I’m sick of her putting me down to uplift herself. She’s the only person I have and could call on, because i now have no friends. But we went from ft every night, telling eachother everything to dry texting every couple of days, or her calling me with some problem with her bf or getting a new vape needing my help. (I don’t even vape!!)I’m sick of it. Should I ghost her when I leave?
summary: my best friend/ cousin and me have been falling off because my abusive mom kicked me out months ago so I can no longer be a teen. And she is the teen we’ve dreamed for as kids. Since getting her dream lifestyle/dream body. She’s became snarky and rude towards me. And as a person in general. She has started being homophobic/fatphobic/racist/and transphobic since her glow up. Putting me down to uplift herself, and making fun of me for not doing what she does. Should I ghost her?
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Thank you! ❤️
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